Burger Fumes & Gerbil Madness!

It's lunch, it's 12 o'clock at college, the excitement! I wonder were we'll go? the college refectory? Subway? Morrisons? Greggs? W H Smith? Burger King? Well on this particular day the choice was burger king and because of the sad disappearance of our Womanizer Drew Brown who was fighting polar bears in Luxembourg at the time. We decided that burger king was the right option to chose seeing as it was a Thursday and we had money in our pockets.

We left our class and couldn't wait to get that burger! On our way to burger king we talked alot of nonsense like we usually do but today was different. We neared the bridge we always use when going to Burger King and were laughing away when suddenly Jordan spotted a gerbil with a machine gun running across the bridge. Jordan roared at the top of his voice "GET OUT THE WAY LADY" where he then pushed an old women thinking he was going to save her from the crazy gerbil but infact the force pushed her off the bridge and she feel into the river.

It was a sort of what the hell? moment as Jordan may have just killed an old woman and a gerbil was running at us with a machine gun. While this was all taking place, me and Craig had hid behind a hedge. I was shitting myself and looked at Craig, he said "If I don't make it, take my nose and give it to my dad, with this nose and that mustache, you could power the whole of  Girvan and Stranraer!". I was shocked with what i was hearing.

The Gerbil was getting closer and Jordan was fapping at the other side of the hedge while singing "All By Myself" and crying. I replied " What are you going to do man?". He looked at me and said "Ryan, will you do what I said?", I nodded my head and whispered good luck man. Craig rubbed his nose and took a deep breath. He looked back at me and then saluted to the sky.

By this time Jordan had finished fapping and was trying to save that old women he pushed into the river. Craig jumped from the bush and roared " NOSE POWER!" a massive wave of energy unleashed itself straight at the gerbil and knocked him out. Me and Jordan ran behind Craig congratulating him. The old women jumped up from the river and hurried over to Craig. She thanked him for saving her life and offered him a blowjob but he said no, Silly move!

We got to Burger king where we all ordered our meals, Mine was a Chicken Royal and chips, yum! We went upstairs and disscussed the crazy event that happened. Not long after this Jordan decided to stick his straw in his cheese burger and drink it. This didn't go well at all, he complained about the burger fumes and me and Craig were gutting ourselves at it. We left burger king and all we could talk about was jordan and the burger fumes.

 We got back to the college just in time for our next class and Drew showed up. "Drew? what you doing back?" Jordan yelled. "Came back early guys, guess what an old women who was attacked by a fat women and a gerbil with a machine gun just gave me a blowjob cause i knew a guy called Craig" Drew said laughing throughout. Jordan and me looked at Craig and started laughing. Drew was confused "What?". "Nothing!" Jordan said laughing. We got back into class and sat down, Craig then said " I wish I said yes to that blowjob now!"